Healing Your Self-Sabotage Patterns

By Karen Robinson

Heal Thrive Dream 

Break Free From Your Old Patterns Now For A More Fulfilling Life

Please register to attend my complimentary event this week, Healing from Self-Sabotage: A Healing Coaching Intensive. Register here: www.healthrivedream.com/healing-self-sabotage/

Healing from self-sabotage is possible! Healing involves understanding the roots of your patterns and making deliberate changes. Here’s  some ideas on how to overcome self-sabotage:

Recognize Your Patterns

The first step is to become aware of your self-sabotaging behaviors. Notice when you’re avoiding tasks, procrastinating, or engaging in negative self-talk. Awareness is the foundation of any change. The easiest way to track your patterns is by keeping a journal. Each day, track events that bothered or triggered you, your thoughts/beliefs, your emotions/feelings, and of course, your behaviors or actions. It is much easier to work on change once you see your patterns. If you need assistance with this, please consider my basic and advance CBT workshops.

Taking a Peak At Your Underlying Causes

Reflect on why you might be sabotaging yourself. Trauma often leaves us with deep-seated fears and negative beliefs. Understanding these can help you see how they influence your actions. No matter what the underlying causes are, please believe you are worthy of healing and feeling better. Trauma does not make you damaged goods. Yes, you may have a scar or two. That sucks, but you are a survivor and deserve more peace.

Challenge Your Negative Beliefs

Replace your negative self-beliefs with positive affirmations or counters, sounds easier than it is. It is easy to tell yourself to stop thinking negatively and say nice things to yourself. If you can do this, awesome. However, I think it is more effective to track negative beliefs, analyze their roots, and then replace with a healthier belief that is believable. The end result is . . . Instead of thinking, “I’m not good enough,” tell yourself, “I am capable and deserving of success.” Shifting your thoughts to healthier, believable thoughts can help break your cycle of self-sabotage.

Set Realistic Goals

Set small, achievable goals that lead to bigger ones. This helps build your self-confidence and reduces the overwhelm that can trigger self-sabotaging behaviors. What realistic goals do you have set? Consider setting them in the different areas of your life for greater success. Need help with this? Schedule a consultation call with me.

Healing Self-Sabotage

15 June 2024, 12:00PM-1:00PM EST

Practice Self-Compassion

Be kind to yourself. Everyone makes mistakes and faces setbacks. You are not alone in this. Treat yourself with the same compassion you would offer a friend in a similar situation. What would you say to your best friend after they make a mistake? Would you condemn them or show them kindness?

Seek Support

Connect with a therapist, coach, or support group. Professional guidance can provide valuable insights and strategies for overcoming self-sabotage. Healing within support groups is a powerful way to heal. Consider my community

Develop Healthy Coping Strategies

Find healthy ways to cope with stress and negative emotions. Exercise, meditation, praying, spiritual readings, journaling, and talking to a trusted friend/family member/therapist/support group can help manage these feelings without resorting to self-sabotage. Practice positive self-talk daily.

If you find meditation difficult, which many survivors do at the beginning of their “be still” journey, try mindfulness exercises such as mindful eating or brushing your teeth. There are multiple mindfulness activities to select from. What have you tried?

Create a Vision for Your Future

Focus on your dreams and goals. Make an action plan for yourself. Visualize the life you want and take steps towards it. This forward-looking approach can motivate you to overcome self-sabotaging behaviors. You can make a vision board or better yet, a vision book for the different areas of your life. Be creative and have fun with this activity!

Celebrate Progress

Acknowledge and celebrate your successes, no matter how small. Recognizing progress reinforces positive behaviors and builds momentum. It is okay to be proud of yourself! Share your wins with friends, family, and your community. You can celebrate your success and still be humble. Give yourself small rewards like a new journal, book, earrings, a fancy pen or whatever lights you up!

Healing from self-sabotage is a possible and you can do it. By understanding its roots, challenging negative beliefs, and seeking support, you can transform your patterns and create a more fulfilling life. Remember, you are capable of change and deserving of a bright future. I am so proud of you!

To learn more about recovering from self-sabotage, please attend my healing coaching intensive.

Empower yourself to break free from old habits and embrace a new chapter of growth and transformation. Sign-up now!

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Karen Robinson

  Karen Robinson  

About the Author

I'm licensed therapist with 25 years of clinical experience. Service driven, specializing in trauma recovery, anxiety, and depression, holistic care, and transformation to create an impact for trauma survivors globally. Services include coaching, therapy, virtual courses, digital products, and on-line memberships.

Are you a survivor in need of HOPE?