For many complex trauma survivors, the idea of meditating can feel anything but peaceful. Sitting still might trigger anxiety, flashbacks, or even a full-body freeze response. If that’s true for you, you’re not alone, and you’re not doing anything wrong. Despite being a trauma recovery therapist for many years, I often still resist meditation.
...In the summer series I’m hosting, Healing Our Bodies After Trauma, I’m noticing my clients and students struggling with meditation. Thus, it prompted me to write this post. Meditation is often praised as a powerful tool for healing just about anything and everything. If you are anything like me, meditation or being still in silence is difficult, and thus feelings of inadequacy can get triggered. What is interesting to me, as a trauma recovery expert, is that most (not all) of my recovering clients struggle with meditation too.
...The first step is to become aware of your self-sabotaging behaviors. Notice when you’re avoiding tasks, procrastinating, or engaging in negative self-talk. Awareness is the foundation of any change. The easiest way to track your patterns is by keeping a journal. Each day, track events that bothered or triggered you, your thoughts/beliefs, your emotions/feelings, and of course, your behaviors or actions. It is much easier to work on change once you see your patterns.
...The holiday season can be a challenging time for many people, especially those who have experienced trauma. Navigating family dynamics during this period can bring up a range of emotions and stressors. As a stress management and historical trauma specialist, I understand the importance of addressing these challenges with a trauma-informed approach. Here are tools for family healing during the Holiday Season.
...Your journey to healing after relationship trauma begins with self-compassion. Refuse to carry feelings of guilt or shame (don’t claim the shame for behaviors you didn’t do or were forced to do, or manipulated in doing). You may not have done something differently to prevented the abuse or betrayal. Recognize your feelings are normal but unhelpful is important for your healing.
...Betrayal trauma is one of the deepest, painful forms of emotional wounds, leaving scars resistant to healing. Betrayal trauma occurs when you depend on another for your emotional, mental, or even physical well-being—such as a spouse, close friend, or family member— and they break your trust in a devastating way. It’s not just about a single event; it’s about the ripple effect that spreads into every part of your life, impacting how you see yourself and the world around you. The pain you feel is real, long lasting, and often feels crippling. It can impact your day to day functioning.
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